#enoughalready

Still trying to understand hashtags. I understand the use of something like #smithandersonwedding or #billingsleyfamilyreunion so that people can search for pics of those events. But for the people that make a post and have 50 hashtags at the end with little to no function, I think maybe they're just misusing it but really wanting to be trendy. Like "happy birthday to my little boy! #birthday #cantbelievehesnotmybabyanymore". That I don't get. First off, when you click on the birthday hashtag you're going to see a million posts that have nothing to do with your own. Second, on the long hashtag, your post will be the only one. I have been told by the kids that if you make a hashtag and clicking on it only reveals your one post, or reveals thousands, it's a hashtag fail.  If you're using hashtags to explain what your post is about, stop it. We can read your post and know what it's about. I don't need to see "so glad Starbucks is open. #coffee #ilovecoffee".  I get it, you want your posts to look cool and hip, but 90% of you are doing it wrong.

"Fans"

Ok, Seahawk "fans," I know you've been waiting for this.  I have been angering people on the Facebook for over a year now with my criticism.  HOWEVER, there is something that keeps getting misunderstood: my criticism is toward fans, not the team itself.
First of all, it was very rare for me to pull up any social media and see posts about the Seahawks before about week 12 of last season.  Then, all of the sudden, they started looking really good and got hot.  Now, my timeline is SWAMPED with posts from people who are acting as though they are lifetime fans and have always been as vocal about it as they are now, when the truth is only a small percentage of those out there were truly dedicated fans through the years previous to 2012.  Look, there is nothing wrong with deciding to become a fan of your home team because they are starting to get really good and exciting to watch, but own up to it.  Don't be a poser and pretend this isn't anything new. 
Second, what is with this obsession with the 49ers?  I understand that they are a division rival, but it's pretty sad how worried Hawk fans are about every little thing about the 49ers.  It's one thing to have a rivalry, it's another to be so obsessed that it makes it obvious that it derives from jealousy.  Yes, they have more rings than you.  Get over it. 
Speaking of jealousy, here comes the part where I eat a little humble pie.  My obsession with hating the bandwagon faux fans probably originates from the fact that I am a die-hard/life-long Bears and Mariners fan.  I have not picked the best teams to be invested in.  But I stick with them and boast about them no matter what.  And, someday, my teams will be good again, and then these same types of people will come out of nowhere and pretend to be just as big of a fan as I am, even though they didn't go through any of the stressful years that I went through.  It's not right. 
To conclude, I challenge all of you to keep an eye on your Facebook timeline.  There are pics of all these people with Seahawk gear on.  You may say to yourself "those are some nice threads."  You know why they look nice?  BECAUSE THEY'RE BRAND NEW.  To the real Hawk fans, to prove that you're not with these other posers, you should all change your profile picture to something showing you in Seahawk gear that was made prior to 2012.  To the bandwagon fans, at least I know I can avoid you by going to Mariner games....for now.

Seriously? We're talking about chalk?

I was perusing the latest headlines on ESPN today, and became ill when I saw that they have decided that a headline-worthy story was that Lebron James is going to be bringing back his pregame chalk-toss routine. Well done, ESPN. This is really important to know. First off, he ripped off the chalk-tossing from Kevin Garnett.  Second, it's stupid.  It's a cry for attention, as if he doesn't get enough while playing the game. But, most importantly, it's a dick move to the people that have to sit there and get doused with chalk to only further encourage this ever-growing ego.
Lebron, if you want to chalk up your hands, just do it.  Don't make a performance out of it.  When I wash my hands at work, I don't wait to make sure everyone is looking, then throw soap and water up in the air and have it land on everyone around.  You know why?  Because it's douchey.  Don't you have enough yet? You're on every other commercial, almost all of your games are televised nationally, and it would take a forklift to move your checkbook.  At some point can't you just be content?  You're like that child that throws fits to get attention.  Only instead of fits, it's chalk and it's landing on people.  Personally, I'll take the fit over your antics any day.

Gun "Control" Gives Control to Criminals

After the tragic Newtown shootings, it seems there are plenty who are using it as an excuse to get on their soap box about gun control.  I think most of them have good intentions, but they are clearly missing an obvious point.  Gun control laws will only hurt law abiding citizens, and help the criminals.  Criminals will find ways to get guns if they want them.  If you think gun control is the answer, you're wrong.  That would be like saying that since cocaine is illegal, no one will use it anymore.  WRONG.  Law abiding citizens won't use it, but criminals will if they want to; and they do.  If we take guns away from the general public, that will mean only criminals will have them.  Then we have no way to defend ourselves and criminals will know that and it will be open game for them.  I'm sure there are some tweaks that should be made as far as what steps to take in order to buy a gun, or keeping automatic weapons off of shelves.  But taking them away is just ludicrous.
I won't speculate as to what would have happened if there was an armed security guard at the Newtown school, because you never know.  But what I do know is that even if guns were illegal, there would still be shootings and innocent people getting killed.  But, at least with current laws, there are good people out there that have a chance to defend themselves.

So we're all Mayans now huh?

So, for those living under a rock, Obama was re-elected for another 4 years last night.  One of the most entertaining things of this whole election is reading the Facebook.  You would think the world is going to end (hence the Mayan reference in the title).  People, there are a lot of things you need to think about here.  First off, let me preface by saying I am not writing this as a "I voted for Obama" post.  This is merely written in hopes to calm down the people who are now building underground bomb shelters for the inevitable end of the world.
First off, there is still a Republican majority in the house.  Keep that in mind when thinking Obama is going to destroy us all.  Also, I think Romney had some brilliant plans and was going to do great things as well, but, in my humble opinion, he hurt himself by being so unaccepting of the gay community.  That lost him millions of votes.  You know how kids now ask their grandparents "is it really true that black people didn't have as many rights as white people back in the day?"  I think, someday, our children or grandchildren will be asking the same about the gay community.  It seems so old fashioned to me to not accept people for who they are.  Some, believe it or not, STILL think it is a choice to be gay.  I'm sorry to burst your bubble, but there is scientific proof that people are born that way.  Why would someone choose to be something that is so unaccepted by a saddening majority of the world?  It's "orientation" not "preference," and bigotry should no longer be accepted.
The main point I think we all should understand here is having a president you didn't vote for or want, in many ways, is like having a loved one marry someone who you think is a jerk.  Whether you think they are right or not, we have to accept them and try and move on with life.  America is beautiful in that we can speak our mind.  If we think something is wrong or needs to be changed, we can speak up.  We can protest.  We can organize efforts to make those changes.  Even better, we can start over with a new leader in four years.  This isn't the end of our country.  He may or may not have been the best option for our leader.  But if he truly was as terrible as so many of you think, would billions of educated voters really vote for him?  I'd like to give my country a little bit of credit as far as being able to cast an accurate vote.
I pray that Obama was the right decision.  I pray that anti-Obama people can accept that he is our leader and move on.  I pray that we can start to be more accepting of orientations (thank you Washington for voting for marriage equality).  I pray that both Obama and the House can discuss topics in a manner that allows them to make fair, just, and educated decisions.  Lastly, I pray that our country can stop fighting over a decision that has been made and can't be changed.

THAT'S WHAT I SAID

     I feel like it's time for me to speak out about the "that's what she said" joke that is being misunderstood by a sadly high amount of people.  

     This joke has been around for decades, but was popularized again by the Michael Scott character on The Office.  The point behind this is that the joke is so overdone and so easy and idiotic that the writers figured Michael Scott would totally latch on to something like that.  Just look at the history of Michael Scott.  His main schtick is that he thinks he's funny but no one else does with the exception of other dumb people (Holly, Packer, etc.)

     Unfortunately, there are people out there who have re-adopted this joke thinking it's actually funny.  I have news for you people, IT'S NOT!  It's easily one of the dumbest jokes one can make.  You can add it to almost any sentence.  The people who think it's funny use it all the time and expect this uproar of laughter each time.  We all know these guys.  This guy could be a total stranger in line in front of you at Subway, say "that's what she said" to his buddy, laugh hysterically at his own joke, then turn around to see if I not only heard the joke but are also laughing.  I wasn't.  Nobody who has half a brain would.  

     So to all the mouth-breathers out there who are using this joke thinking it's going to catapult them to comedy stardom, please stop.  It's only meant to be funny in an ironic way.  If you don't realize that, you are the type of person they are making fun of with the Michael Scott character.

More Idiots

I think it's dumb when people have stickers on the back of their cars for stuff like Apple, Nike, Oakley, etc. Are you advertising?

If we're putting stickers of brands we like, should I put Hanes and Aquafresh stickers on my car?

What's funny is they're usually on cars where you see the car and you're thinking "there's no way that dude can afford Oakleys."